Fate is Chance. Destiny is Choice.

Monday, March 06, 2006

Put Your Records On

I have to say that the title is a shameless plug of Corinne Bailey Rae's fabby song - I ordered the album on HMV (with student discount!) as she sounds great - this fab summery rich sound like Billie Holiday. Definitely an artist to keep your ears tuned to!

My weekend has been boring to say the least, I've somehow got another cold which keeps making me sneeze every few minutes. I had a rash over the past couple of weeks and luckily that's gone...I seem to have numerous bodily complaints, especially during the winter! At least it's March and things might be getting better (unless you count hayfever, yuk). I've pretty much been studying for a procedural essay by reading stuff all weekend and tomorrow I am taking a trip to the library..fun.

I'm not entirely sure why I am blogging at this late hour, as I should be tucked up in bed trying to get rest to ward off the cold. It's just one of those times when there's too much going around in your head to feel like sleeping, although I think my body is exhausted! I had dinner really late though as I was doing some more work on the computer..a students life, eh? I like the late night thinking sessions though...most of the time. Since my last post (which wasn't very long ago!) I've been thinking more about the Feminist issue and I really urge you to look at www.thefword.org.uk because it covers a lot of issues that matter to Feminists and women from all walks of life. It's easy to read and you will find that a lot of it makes sense. I sometimes get the feeling that men feel defensive about some of the issues brought up by Feminism, mostly because men perhaps feel that feminists/women are criticising them. On the other hand, feminists are trying to make the world a better place for both men and women, free of the constraints and pressures that make them feel they have to fit certain ideals and roles within society.

I for one, contrary to belief (like most people think feminists think), think that being a mother and father is one of the most magical and responsible things anyone can do, but at the same time this doesn't mean, by biological default, that women are meant to stay at home, cook and do everything around the house - parenting and domestic stuff shouldn't be prescribed to just one person. It's about equality, not making a matriarchal society, but a fair society. Until the normalization of pornographic images stops and is put back where they belong (out of the public domain and into places where people go if they are looking for that kind of thing), we cannot have a truly equal and safer society. There have been studies that show that so called 'lads mags' often have hard core pornographic images and yet they are in public, next to teenager magazines and childrens comics etc. I find this horrifying because children and teenagers are subjected to these images at an even earlier age. Newsagents are reluctant to remove them in some cases because they generate so much profit. I found, as a young woman, that newspapers such as the Sun and earlier versions of 'lads mags' made me feel uncomfortable and violated especially when read by young men my own age.

Some people say that some images in pornography or in lads mags are 'empowering' to women. How are they empowering? They perpetuate the dominant image of women as submissive, constantly in submissive or provocative positions. Especially those considered 'dominating' because they wear leather or pvc and wield whips should not be seen as empowering because they are acting out particular male fantasies. I defy any woman to feel comfortable or empowered by wearing a leather catsuit or being subjected to pain by whipping or so on. Most women going in for S&M do so because their partner is interested in it (most fetishes are male perpetuated, such as feet fetishes which involves crippling women by the wearing of ever higher high heels). The best book that covers these things is by Sheila Jeffreys called 'Beauty and Misogyny' (2005).

She also points out that women shaving their pubic hair and undergoing vaginal and labia surgery often do so because they believe that their genitals should look like those of porn stars and they believe that, because their partners or husbands use pornography, they find this attractive. Most women have no idea what their genitals are meant to look like in reality and I find this sad because no part of a female body is safe anymore. I think men with fetishes of parts of a woman's body are not appreciating the person and body as a whole, as a person they should respect and care about.

I am not criticising individual women who undertake such practices but I believe that if there were no pressures like this then we would all appreciate our bodies and not subject them to awful torture under the name of 'surgery' or 'beauty practices'. We would feel that our bodies are precious - they are, after all, the only ones that we have. We should all be appreciated as individual, and love ourselves instead of inflicting such pain, cutting and moulding things to size through dieting, surgery, waxing and other painful procedures which serve to lower self esteem and make women feel as though they are 'worthless' as they are.

Well..I know I've done my fair share of ranting and stuff recently but it really is food for thought. I mean, nobody flinches anymore when they see surgery being filmed on TV, or when they see a woman on her hands and knees in a so called 'provocative' pose. Men would object if every woman's magazine was covered with naked men in submissive poses, pouting at the camera, objectified. Men would object if they were suddenly pressured to remove their body hair and cut up their genitals and chests. Why should women feel such pressure? We are not sex objects and should never have to be. Relationships should be based on mutual love and understanding and respect for each other's bodies.

Hmm..anyway! I promise my next blog post will be about something different (maybe!). Don't be alarmed if I don't post for a while as I'll be hard at work writing essays! :)

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1 Comments:

  • I think on balance your views are correct, the top shelf may be withering at the hands of other delivery channels, but scanning downards to find newspapers and cleverly marketed magazines (i.e. with content adjusted slightly to broaden the market to teenage boys)increasingly crowding our newspaper stalls. There is a real need to stop the "pornolisation" of our society, not because sexual activity is bad per se, but because it is promoting sex as product that is purchased. The sex industry is my view now very accessible via easy, seemingly harmless steps, the boys reading zoo or whatever will presumably think lap dancing bars are cool and then presumably it isnt a much bigger step to start consuming prostitution.

    However I wonder if the comments about women and SM, shaving and porn are well justified? Firstly the SM scene is quite often dominated by men dressed in female attire projecting dubious female personas. Secondly, if there are women there, they are usually dominant. I confess that I have never fully understood the BDSM community, it strikes me as more about exhibitionism than sex.

    On the whole however we have to be mindful that sexual outlooks are complex features of the human mind. My own feeling is that individual preferences and fantasies should not fall victim to critique by groups be they religious, feminist, etc, nor should they be a vehicle for large business to promote their products (eg the lad mags dont give a damn about the bdsm scene)

    My experience is that there is significant consumption of porn by women and this is supported by studies. Surprising given how awful it is, I mean its a bit like being a brain numbed football fan, personally I would rather get in on the action myself...

    This is rambling a bit, however I think it is important not to be perceived as anti sex as a feminist, or particularly anti fun. Therefore I hope you continue your work, but hope also that the feminist movement occupies suitable middle ground so not to alienate the body of people who support the cause but could be threatened by some of the language.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, At 9:55 pm  

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